Monday, August 07, 2006

To lock or not to lock, sharing my life, sneaky bastards, circle of trust and gossip.

I have been toying the idea of locking up this blog OR moving it to another host that allows me to lock it up and closing this blogspot one down.

But I feel the dull ache well up in my chest when I think about relocating. I have put in a considerable amount of effort into setting up this blog. It is nothing fancy, just simple HTML all over. But I like the way it is. Simple, readable text with no obscure hidden buttons that drive you up the wall. I like it.

I have written a few hundred posts since 2004 and you can imagine the amount of effort put into it. It started off with just plain writing, and then I added photos. Soon I was showing my shopaholic side to anyone in the world who would read about it. I shared my ups and my downs (mostly downs) with everyone. Even my outrageous crushes and embarassing display of joy over my newfound boyfriend.

But some people are just downright sneaky, despicable and hateful.

I am not talking about strangers who stumble upon this little website. I am talking about family and friends. When I disclose my blog address to you, it is because I trust you and I am more than willing to let you have an inkling of what is going on in my life. I want to share them with you. You are IN the "circle of trust".

However, when you go behind my back and feed my parents, your parents and the rest of my clan tidbits of my life you get from this blog, you are betraying my trust in you. I share all these with you because I trust you. And if I find the need or the right time to tell the entire family about my life, I will. I do not need you as a "public broadcast service" and blab about my life to your parents/my parents like it is some juicy gossip that you can share and ridicule me.

I find it especially childish, selfish, inconsiderate and despicable of you when you stoop this low, betray my trust and make me the prime target of gossip, ridicule, shame and the leading lady of the upcoming family uproar that will inevitably come with this.

I trusted you, and yet you betrayed me just because "gossiping is fun". I do not hate you, but I do not particularly like you either.

You are NO LONGER in the "circle of trust".

Please butt out of my life. And shut your cakehole.

p.s. Come to think of it, I am not the one in the wrong so why should I relocate? I should address the problem and clear up any misunderstanding right now. I will not relocate.

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