Wednesday, August 15, 2007

Captain's dinner, humour and Dilbert-ish people in my office.

My Captain J hosted his first Captain's Dinner last night. I wonder if it went well.

He was nervous about the welcome speech he had to make as Captain. I wonder if he added my "your lifejackets can be found under your seats. Please store away your table and fasten your seat belt during landing and takeoff" in his speech. Hmm.

It would be hilarious. At least I think it's funny. I see humour in the worst possible places.

Like the woman who is in charge of the store room at work. She either speaks at the top of voice, or at the frequency that best carries sound because people at the far end of the office can hear her. Through walls.

I dislike her. She doesn't smile at people. She scowls. But she also looks like that woman in Dilbert.

I think happy thoughts and try not to burst out laughing when I see her. That's one of the ways of surviving, turning contempt into joy glorious joy.

We have Black Ninja (you know who), Patrick (of Spongebob fame), Loud Howard (Dilbert) and Bob the Dinosaur (Dilbert).

He is one of the managers in my office, who saunters around like an overfed policeman patrolling the streets, looking for another doughnut (with filling) or 2. Spouts rubbish very loudly. Friend of Woman from Dilbert.

This is his TRUE body shape. Not a joke.

Next we have Loud Howard, Patrick's Number 1 Minion.

-- Thank you Wikipedia!

Doesn't do much. Part of the patrol. And bald. He looks for at leasts 2 doughnuts so he can kiss ass.

And Bob the Dinosaur.

Happy go lucky fella in the office who has a mobile phone pouch he clips to his belt. And due to the nature of his job (to put up Message of the Day), he overcompensates by splurging on all things. From his collection of Snoopy toys from Happy Meal, to headphones (because another guy has it) and a number of expensive watches (again, because some other guys have it). Goes around showing off his new toys, "hey check out my new Omega Speedmaster."

Dude, we get it. Stop telling us you have something new to play with.

It is a slow day in the office.

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