Tuesday, April 08, 2008

Jabba the Hutt works in my office.

I am not a work Nazi. I am most definitely not the hardest working person around. I don't expect a person to sit at his desk 24/7, but I do expect work to be done.

But Chilli Sauce M.. has got to be the laziest person I have ever met.

I swear to God he looks like Jabba the Hutt. And maybe for the reason of anonymity. I'll call him Jabba here.

[Just in case someone Googles "Chilli Sauce M-n" and gets re-directed here. So not looking forward to explaining why I bitch about him online. =/

So much for freedom of speech.]

Anyhoo he didn't show up for work yesterday and no one knew why. The managers had no idea why he didn't turn up, whether he took time off because he worked overtime. No news. No one was informed. Nothing.

So when the client called to ask whether Jabba was attending the meeting (which had started 15 minutes without him), that was the last straw for a lot of people in my team. We had to work around his non-presence which could be dealt with internally. But when the clients started calling about a meeting no one else knew about, no one wanted to take up his mess. What were we going to tell the client? That he's not there because he's a lazy fat arse?

My hatred disdain for Jabba goes way back.

At first, it was just his personal habits that put me offhey u at . He brings his own chilli sauce wherever he goes, thus the name I bestowed upon him behind his very big back.

It's not the little sachets you get from Maccas takeaway. It's a whole frickin' bottle of condiment. He proudly said, "I bring this with me. I fly back to Indonesia to buy in bulk when I run out." Needless to say, normal human beings like the rest of us don't find that passion for chilli that endearing. Or normal.

Personal preferences aside, I didn't feel anything towards him. In fact, I felt nothing.

Until he said something mean and insulting to me once, in front of my managers and team. It was a personal insult and ever since then, I have zero respect, tolerance nor patience for the Hutt. I refuse to talk to him unless absolutely necessary.

Like "please move because your ass you are blocking the way to the printer".

[I'm so not touching his keyboard, phone and mouse.]

This contempt for Jabba aggravated over time. Little things like his half eaten yogurt left overnight on his desk, regular nose digging in full view of the office, nap time, constant tardiness and lack of responsibility towards every aspect of work snowballed into this palpable disapproval for Jabba.

Black Ninja has got nothing on Jabba.

[For more stories on Black Ninja, Dim Bulb and maybe Short-lived Newbie, please go via the labels or maybe the links below.]

Jabba the Hutt - Wikipedia entry
Seinfeld - Official website
The Soup Nazi - Wikipedia entry

Posts I've tagged
- Black Ninja
- Dim Bulb


Sleepy Scott said...

Did Jabba ever show back up at work? What was his excuse for bailing on the meeting with external clients?

Rach said...

Jabba has tendered his resignation last Thursday.

And there I was, looking forward to starting a Jabba Chronicles when he had to throw a wrench into my plans.


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