Friday, May 02, 2008

10 Things Men Don't Know About Women - Part 2

  1. Makeup on men NEVER works. Unless you're a Cirque Du Soleil performer or attending Halloween. You see what happened to that Disney dude in that High School god-knows-what-crap of a movie? People just wonder about his orientation because of his perfect makeup. It's just nature's way of telling you not to meddle with our war paint.

  2. We really really must love you if we sit through an entire B/C/D grade movie produced by WWE starring some wrestler.

  3. You really really must love us if you sit through an entire SERIES of chick flicks (i.e. Bridget Jones' series) with us. Hey, it just happens there are 2 Bridget Jones movies and we just want to find out what happens next.

  4. We turn to mush and speak to you in sweet girly voices in OUR (read: you and me) lovey dovey language when we have absolutely privacy. It doesn't come to us naturally as well. And we do get embarassed. Just like you.

  5. If you want to lie, make sure we don't find out. Because we won't tell you we know. And that little nagging doubt about why you had to lie will mean we will most probably never be able to trust you completely. Ever.

  6. Sometimes we just want you to order first at the restaurant. That way we can order something different and trade food.

  7. Unless you have been kidnapped by aliens, terrorists or some crazy madmen who lived in the wilderness with zero network coverage, you should be contactable. Because if we call/text/email you, we expect a reply within the day.

  8. We like having your stuff around our place, because it means you are in our Circle of Trust and has been elevated to "Family" status, which naturally warrants a little wardrobe space. Plus, you have to come back to us because your stuff is with us, including your brand new shiny Mac desktop. It's an emotional deposit at our bank.

  9. Be nice to our family members. They have been our family for all our lives despite being a total pain in the ass. We can gripe about them, but we'll get defensive when you join in the fray.

  10. When you tell us you wished you have better clothes when you go out with us, we just want to give you big swoonsome hugs because we love you for who you are. We don't really care about the Zegna shirt on your back. But we do draw the line at sports jerseys or any kind of sportswear.


teapot said...

i like it, now all i need is a gf to put these in practice

Rach said...

Hi teapot,

how's things on the gf bit?

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