Monday, March 31, 2008

Prison Break, terrorist and trouble with wondering out loud.

I survived an earthquake in February. Now I can proudly say "I survived an earthquake and a terrorist jailbreak".

A month ago, a terrorist escaped from the detention center and he has been on the loose since. Orange alert from Interpol. The works.

Security forces comb forests off KJE, Labrador Park for JI fugitive

The guy has a limp. Most probably in prison garb. And he managed to limp out of the detention center without being caught. Now beat that, Prison Break.

The man's escape has caused lots of inconvenience for people on the island state. Thorough checks for every single vehicle is causing severe traffic congestions. Military and immigration personnel are in bullet-proof vests. It looks like everything is on high alert. Like post 9/11.

Singapore says no evidence Mas Selamat fled to Indonesia

Despite all assurances, I wonder if the gimpy guy has made his way back to Terrorist Haven. It has been a month and there isn't anything much on the news. If he is, he must be snickering at all the silly checks in place right now after his escape. Evil people snicker, like Stewie Griffin.

In other conspiracy related news, it is also speculated that he has kicked it.

[For reasons such as me trying not to get arrested for any drawing or writing that imply things that may or may not be true, I won't be spelling words in their entirety. You know, so it's more of your interpretation. Of sorts.]

I wonder if I'll get into trouble for wondering. Internal Security fellas, I mean no harm. I just think a lot.

Saturday, March 29, 2008

Disheartened, team work and office full of jackasses.

I am very disheartened at work.

Since the start of the year, my team merged with another after my team leader left. The idea of merging 2 teams was ok with me, until incompetence and bitchiness (coming from men!! The ultimate backstabbers.) drove me to the brink of resignation.

My little team has become the helpdesk/telephone operator "he's not as his desk, please call back later" for the whole team.

We are engineers and analysts, not your fucking secretary who takes messages for you.

Team work means helping each other. So far it has been me helping them take phone calls. Helping them with their rotation. But no one is helping me with my team's projects. Team work should work both ways, and not a one way traffic courtesy of Rach who is probably chained to her desk because jackasses just won't pick up calls, or has ninja-ed out of the office.

There was a training for Sun application server 9.1 this week but my little team wasn't informed. So the whole team went, except for us, bewildered why the office was empty on Monday morning.

We are not mad at the fact that the course didn't include us, because maybe if God willing, we'll be able to attend the next class. I'm just friggin' pissed off about why we are not kept in the loop.

Why we were left behind.

If the management throw the "team work - let's help one another" thing at me, they can go f*ck themselves. Or each other.

I am very dejected with work at the minute. I feel like saying "f*ck your sense of superiority if you think your project is more important than mine. I'm quitting. I'm getting married. I'm relocating to Australia where the sky is so blue I get lost looking at it. Since you think my projects are easy compared to yours, you do it. Good bye. And hello Surfers Paradise."

No I'm not going to wear a puffy monstrosity with a dead peacock stuck to my head. And no I'm not actually getting married yet because someone hasn't asked.

I like my job, but i hate my colleagues, especially my team leader. Such a tool. At the workplace, dimwits and jackasses are everywhere. But to have a team that's 80% jackasses, God must be testing me.

He must be. It must be one of those "survive these tribulations and ye shall be rewarded". You definitely have a quirky sense of humour, You Omnipotent One.

Alanis Morissette is God.

Wednesday, March 26, 2008

10 Things Men Don't Know About Women - Part 1 has an interesting feature on 10 Things You Don't Know About Women.

They get famous celebrities to write a 10 things men don't know about women. I reckon I can do better since I have way more than 10. I have to keep it as wholesome as possible because some of my family members read this. Word gets around. I don't like it when word gets around and gets twisted. I don't like the world to know what I know. is proud to present "10 Things Men Don't Know About Women - Part 1".

  1. We don't like the world to know what we know. What we portray, that's the version you get. The moment we curse like a sailor in front of you despite of our carefully crafted, polished and virginal image you have come to know and love, it means we love you enough to blow our own cover. Welcome to the Circle of Trust.

  2. Us singing in the car is cute. You farting in the car isn't.

  3. Make that expelling gas anywhere that hasn't got good ventilation (i.e. between the sheets) is just bad manners. And no it doesn't mean "we're comfortable with each other".

  4. Sometimes we really wish you'd plan a great day/evening out before picking us up after work. We are mentally worn out and our brains can't work anymore. This earns you brownie points.

  5. Telling us we should consider exercise = you losing brownie points. We are just lazy comfortable about ourselves.

  6. PMS sucks. P means Pre, Post and most likely Permanent. We think we're pregnant one second, and then we go all sore and grumpy for days. Before you shrug our discomforts off, you try bleeding nonstop for a week.

  7. We are constantly paranoid that there's someone else. Tell us you love us. Or there's someone else to stop us from going mad. Because we will just get angry instead of insane. That's one less emotion. It shortens your pain too. Just think of it as a bandaid.

  8. You cooking for us = major brownie points, Boy Scout! Just don't leave the disaster zone of a kitchen to us. It's supposed to be a whole package aww-you're-so-sweet for us.

  9. We love it when you clean up after us and yourself. It means you are man enough to take care of us.

  10. You know when we fight? Be a man and come talk to us. Yes we may scream or sulk or ignore the living crap out of you, but we really want you to make the first move.

Esquire's 10 things - 10 Things You Don't Know About Women.

Tuesday, March 25, 2008

Life with(out) J, being lost and my OCD.

J has gone back to work last Wednesday, and about 24 hours later, he was safely in his cabin and starting work in 6 hours' time.

[I would probably need the help of God Almighty, standing next to bed pulling me up if I had to work 6 hours after my 24 hour journey.]

-- I'm a stalker, monitoring the exact time that plane departs the airport. At the comfort of my home of course.

Believe me, it hasn't exactly gotten easier to send him off at the airport.

It feels strange to not see him waiting for me at the lobby every lunch break.
It feels strange not to have someone beside my almost 24/7.

I can't help but feel a little lost. I'm on my own again. I have grown so used to the "two of us" and now when I'm back to square one, it feels like something is wrong. I find this quite unsettling. Have I lost the ability to be independent?

-- Me time. 24/7.

[There was a time when I celebrated having the luxury of being alone. You know, having a bit of a breathing space? A funny true story. The kind with awkward laughs. Heh.]

I have always been on my own. I lived alone since uni days and I love every minute of it. Yes, the bills kill me every month. Like yesterday when I paid $300 for utilities and broadband. F*cking standards of living. My paycheck is not where I want it to be but hey, I'm paying for my own things and I'm officially not getting a handout from mommy and daddy anymore.
Yay for me?

In spite of this triumph comes the loneliness. There are times when I don't know what to do. I don't have anyone to talk to or someone to go out with because I can't get anyone at short notice since everyone's working/tired/busy/accompanying their other half.

I try to keep myself occupied, which explains why all the cleaning and laundry have been done. I'm a clean freak because of all these years of solitude. I clean to past time. I even developed OCD.

[I hang my towel perfectly so neither side is longer than the other. I organise my clothes according to colour, in ascending shade of the color. I fold all my clothes to all approximately the same size so they stack up nicely into a rectangular block. Not blob. Tell me that isn't OCD.]

Gawd, it's strange to be alone again.

Thursday, March 20, 2008

Frolick and my lactose intolerance.

I had walked past Frolick a few times and said to myself "I have to try this mysterious yogurt JUST BECAUSE of the youthful design of the stall". Every single time.

[I mean, high tables and flimsy stools can't be for old folks right? It's not posturepedic!]

-- 10 bucks says the table will fly when a freak storm hits.

But every single time, I'd overeat at some other restaurants and skip this dessert because I'd probably burst if I take another mouthful.

[I was actually pretty concerned about taking a whole cup of yogurt, since I'm friggin lactose intolerant. Yeah, sad little girl who can't take Ben & Jerry's Chunky Monkey.

Guess what, Lactose Intolerance? I will eat ice cream and yogurt and all the yummy dairy products out there till I get over you!!!! *swears revenge*]

Not this time! I ordered Cup A (ooooh how cheeky! I'm implying I'm .. never mind.) just in case the yogurt tastes like crap squeezed out of a machine.

-- I get a badge !

At first sight I was skeptical. White swirly creamy thing in a cup. What if it's plain? What if it's plain .. disgusting?

To be on the safe side, I ordered blueberry toppings, which I hope would drown out whatever evil foul-tasting concoction of puree cow fudge I just bought. Just in case. Toppings come at $1 each.


It was surprisingly ok. Looks like soft serve from Maccas but a whole lot less sweet. Just the way I like it. It tastes like yogurt but melts a lot faster. Nothing fantastic. Totally meh. But since they hand out cheeky but totally adorable pins with every purchase, I might come back if I need cheeky badges to brighten up my day. Cheap thrill.

Then again, maybe not.

The 2 girls manning the stall were absolute rubbish. Somehow I think they chose to work there to be seen. Oh puh-lease. You are the yogurt girl. Attend to your customers and stop adjusting your skinny belt on your very tiny short shorts.

Teenagers. Pfft.

Tuesday, March 11, 2008

Recent election.

There was an election held recently and I didn't vote. I don't think I even registered.

-- What's a trapdoor doing there?

Quite a few people had some things to say about the recent election. They were quite riled up, and the word "passionate" immediately came to mind. I will not use words like "passionate" to describe people who exercise their rights to elect the next Cabinet to rule the country. It was a "follow the crowd" mentality for some. I hope they followed the right crowd.

Personally I'm apathetic towards the political scene of my birth country. I hardly spend time there, I can't sing my national anthem and frankly, I'm not ashamed. If patriotism were measured by how well a person can sing his national anthem, and how many little flags he has planted all over his car, then I don't want to be one of them.

I am a demoralised citizen. I see unjust distribution of resources and biased opportunities presented to people who didn't have to work for them on the basis of race. There is no meritocracy. And there is no way such an entrenched practice encouraged, well let's just be honest here shall we, ENFORCED for a good decade or more be eradicated for the good of the entire nation.

What is the point of voting? To many, it is the power to choose the lesser of 2 evils. It is the power to remove an incumbent leader bringing a nation to an unavoidable and quick downfall.

But who will be the replacement? Is there even a replacement? Can we settle when we choose the leaders of the country?

I want to be the citizen of a country who treats every citizen fairly. I want places in university to be available to everyone based on academic merit. I want a country where religious freedom is respected. I want a country where career opportunities are open to all who qualifies. I want a country who wants progress and is willing to work hard for it.

-- I know who to vote for.

My birth country has rich resources and the possibilities are limitless and I believe it will move forward under the right leadership. To see a country divided by race and religion, and how a 130% voter turnout is considered normal and is still not enough to get the elections declared null, it is just another insult to us as citizens.

I remain demoralised.

Friday, March 07, 2008

10.000 B.C. and what I think it actually means.

J and I have been looking forward to watching 10,000 B.C. ever since we saw the trailers. Woolly mammoths, sabre-toothed tigers and cavemen... we couldn't wait.

Woolly mammoths! With tusks!

We were really excited about the movie. We didn't Google the movie because we wanted to save the surprise when we actually see it.

Sabre-toothed tiger with killer fangs!

Check out his "My spear is better than your fangs" stance.

If they screened these during the trailers, I should be expecting T-rex spitting out mammoth bones somewhere in the movie, right?

Apparently, I was wrong.

[By that admission, you guys wouldn't pay to watch the movie, right? Because I'm about to spill the beans on the movie right now.]

  • It's a boy meets girl, boy spouts some mushy "my love for you will never change" words to pretty girl with blue eyes.
  • Pretty Girl with Blue Eyes (PGBE) is a THE trophy for the strongest man who kills with Papa Mammoth of Mammoth herd.
  • Tribe is attacked by Beast with Four Legs (BFL). Killer horses to you and me but cavemen are slow that way.
  • PGBE enthralls Man on BFL and is captured.
  • Boy who Spouts Mushy Words (BSMW) embarks on journey to save mankind, slaves and his PGBE.

I am blown away. By the lack of depth and predictability.

-- Pretty Girl with Blue Eyes. Gotta get 'em contacts.

Along the movie, you will see:
  • animals,
  • lots of tribes,
  • ships with sales,
  • pyramids,
  • entire block of gold for the tip of the pyramid, and
  • cars in the background during shots of animals cantering across safari fields.

Honestly, for a movie with a multi-million dollar budget, you would think that they'll edit the headlights of the f*cking cars out of the movie. But no! Because audience is stupid enough to pay for the movie, so they may actually be stupid enough to assume the f*cking headlights are actually f*cking bonfires.

*Rolls eyes*

I want a caveman movie. Caveman thumping his chest Tarzan-style, clubbing a sabre-toothed tiger and discovering fire. And maybe burn down his little leather tent for comic relief. A movie that explores LIFE as a caveman, hunter-gatherer balance (aka "Cavemen vs Cavewoman: Are You Going To Pick That Up" debate), animals dying out, T-rex spitting out mammoth bones, pterodactyls swooping down and FINALLY ends with huge meteor hurling towards earth, heralding the arrival of what we modern man have come to know as the Ice Age.

And not some f*cking killer turkeys chasing and hunting cavemen in overgrown lawn.

Killer turkeys. I'm not kidding. Watch the movie and tell me those are NOT turkeys.

-- Training for Olympics 2008?

I'm not a director, screenwriter nor producer. If I can come up with a much better/engaging storyline, they have got a problem. If I want to watch a movie that's part Apocalypto (Mayans, pyramids, half naked men running in jungles), part 300 (another guy with God Complex), part Pathfinder (it's like Pocahontas, but with Vikings. It is another movie that sucks so much the black hole barely stands a chance. I gave up writing on it because I almost barfed while trying to recollect bits from the movie.), I would watch all 3 of those movies.

-- Pocahontas with Vikings.

Not an "original" movie which borrows heavily on all 3.

10,000 B.C = 10,000 bull crap.

10,000 B.C. - Official site
Apocalypto - Wikipedia entry (contains lots of info)
Dude with God Complex - Xerxes I of Persia
Pathfinder - Entry on Rotten Tomatoes. Enough said.
Slate - 10,000 B.C. review

Tuesday, March 04, 2008

Bic Runga, Sway and shameless heartstrings.

Sway - Bic Runga

It has been 11 years but this song continues to give me goosebumps. Shamelessly tugging at my heartstrings.

Sorry for not posting as regularly as promised. J is here so all my time is going to canoodling time. Will write more when I'm over the whole canoodling thing. :D

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