Saturday, December 19, 2009

Cities of hope and dreams.

Jay Z & Alicia Keys - Empire State of Mind


in New York, concrete jungle where dreams are made of,
Theres nothing you can’t do,
Now you’re in New York,
These streets will make you feel brand new,
The lights will inspire you,
Lets here it for New York, New York, New York


After watching the video, I can't help but ask what would I become if I had taken my pick of NYU. Then again, the exchange rate was sky high. Defenceless on my own without a trust fund (NYC is expensive). I would have been there during 9/11. My parents would be so worried. And my dear friend moved back to NJ because it was too stressful to live and make it in the world of NYC.

Then again, that's not saying that I wouldn't want to give it a shot if an opportunity presents itself.

There are very few cities in the world that earn the undying love of their dwellers. There's something mesmerizing about them and you wouldn't want to live anywhere else.

I believe there are a few places in the world where you feel like you can achieve something. You could be an aspiring graffiti artist or fashion designer or you are the most amazing chef waiting to be discovered. You could be whatever you want to be.

Sydney is one of the places I feel this way. I felt... hopeful. I could be someone. I could achieve something.

I wish I could feel that way again.




Wednesday, December 16, 2009

Parenting, home and we are still children.

Work had been an utter pain (as usual) and since my annual leave will be forfeited if I don't use them, I decided to just eff work and run home with J. We stayed at my parents' for almost a week and it was strangely nice and comforting.


I was always a little iffy if my parents will ever get used to an Australian son-in-law as they are not confident in English. "Eat, eat." as mom pushed more food towards J.



My parents fed us nonstop when we were home. We woke up to different store bought brekkie everyday, and lunches and dinners at their favourite haunts. When J wanted to buy new sandals, we went to 3 different malls just to get the best price. J was horrified. He felt he had imposed on them.

I mean, taking care of us in every little thing isn't what J is used to.

J thinks we are so lucky that my (our?) parents pamper us like this. I think we're very lucky too. :D

I guess it's a very Asian parenting thing to mother us. Even though our combined age is over 50, we are still helpless little children to them.


FTJ and updating monster.com

When life throws you lemons, make lemonade.

-- that actually looks inviting

That's optimistic.

What if, what if, life throws you mouldy lemons? What next? You can't make mouldy lemonade. All you get is a splotch of green mould on your clothes because you were trying to shield your face from the bunch of mouldy squishy lemons.

The company gives out cards to staff every December to compliment them on their hard work for the year. Each staff receives a voucher of $20 because the company feels that all the weekends and overtime we work for free for the ENTIRE YEAR is only worth $20.

I don't care about the $20 because I don't know what that can buy from the store. It's like giving me $20 Apple store voucher. I can't even buy an iPhone cover for that.



All I want is some sort of acknowledgment for my work. Even the gentlest pat on the back will be a decent gesture.

Anyhoo I just spotted the card on my colleague's table, for the hard work he has put in for working over weekends on our project.

I didn't get one.

Waaaaaaaaaaait.
Wasn't those the weekends we were on shift to cover OUR project?

The weekends when we were in office shivering from the bitter cold and humidity away from our family?

AWAY FROM MY NEWLYWED HUSBAND?


I have never felt more overlooked in my entire life.

F8ck this job. (FTJ.)

I'm updating Monster.com this very instant.


Puppy wuppy for me.

Isn't he adorable????



After the total cuteness that is the peekaboo kitten, I'm in full pet mode.

I want a beagle puppy wuppy!!


Tuesday, December 15, 2009

The Muppet strikes again1




Money, waste and the lifestyle we lead.

Perhaps I have become more sensible, I no longer shop to feel better.

Woe to the malls, I know.

For the better part of the last decade, shopping makes me happy. There is something about the feel and smell of new clothes and bags. The moment you unwrapped it from the tissue the saleslady lovingly wrapped around your purchase, the crisp sharp edges of the paper bags and the tiny ribbons they tie around the handles instead of using generic tape to seal the bag.

-- Not mine but ooooooh how I wish

It was a present from me to me. And I got lots of presents everytime I hit the shopping stretch on this tiny island.

Expanding my collection of clothes and bags was not a problem, especially after I started working. I had income, and I justified the purchases.

"Oh I need it for work"
"You dress for success!"
"I know it is expensive but I'm going to use it a gazillion times so the average cost per use is low! It's affordable"


Now, I can't. I look at them, and with a sad knowing smile I peel myself away from the shops. I no longer have room nor money for any purchases. I recently found old clothes I haven't worn in years (!) and they are in great condition. Probably from the lack of wear and tear anyway.



I feel shame, and mostly guilt towards myself for wasting thousands of dollars that are now newly folded or hung in my closet.



I am self centered, yes. People would say, "Oh you could have donated all the things you don't need anymore, or just donated the money you spent."

But I am a hoarder. I still love my purchases, I just didn't use them as frequently as I should. And I'm in no financial state to donate hundreds of dollars every month to the charities. It should have gone towards some investment for my future. I am the charity case.




I guess these are just some things I realise now. Have you ever felt like you're not earning enough for the lifestyle you want to have?


Thursday, December 03, 2009

I heart fluffy kittens.

OMG this is just too adorable. My insides are instantly transformed into a warm fuzzy mess when I lay eyes on it.



Cute kittens can end wars.


Tuesday, December 01, 2009

It has been 1 month.

I was reading Heart of Light when I came across this.


-- image from Heart of Light

Oops I should really sit down with J and start writing our thank you cards to everyone. And maybe write our Christmas ones at the same time too.

Oh, today's our 1 month wedding anniversary! Yay for us!


I heart bunnies on notepads.

My love for bunnies run deep. And this is just the thing to brighten my day!



I came across this lovely download from A Print A Day and it beats scribbling on pieces of scrap paper on my desk.

Available for download here.

Thanks A Print A Day!


Link:
Cute bunnies - link
Bunnies and cardboard - link


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